His world. Oh, how I want in it, yet, how strange, that he wants in mine. Or theirs rather. A yard full of kids and he is torn between what he knows or what he is comfortable with versus the land of “free play” and social time. He has tried several times to assert himself in their games, but it’s hard. He loves music. Kids Bop mainly, but the radio in general. So, there he sits, in the garage atop little power wheel truck they got from my daddy for their birthday when they were 3 and 4-years-old. He’s listening to music but often stares at the kids jumping in leaves, playing ball in the street, and running wild.
He gets up suddenly and runs out there to get their attention telling them what song is on the radio. He’s overly excited. At least to them. They just stare at him and go back to their game. Not being mean to him or anything. At this age, kids haven’t developed the skills to pretend something is interesting if it isn’t. Except the little girl who comes over. She is very sweet in nature. She is good with him. Like his cousin Olivia, she just seems to connect with him better than most. Oliva laughs sometimes at some of the stuff he does, but not giggling at him. He knows when people do that.
Last week he was upset after school and he told me a story about something that had happened earlier that day. He said, “_______ made me cry today. He smiled at me and I saw him. I did not like that.” To say it broke my heart would be an understatement. But, what do you do? You can’t police the whole world. I just try my best to give him the skills to handle those situations. Hope for the best.
A while back, I flipped on the tv and Forrest Gump was playing. Such a wonderful movie I have seen hundreds of times, but this time was different. Through different eyes. It was to the part where Forrest had ran back home because his mama was dying. Makes a lump come to my throat just typing these words.